Just because your friend or family member got married after a year of meeting someone doesn’t mean YOU have to do the same thing. It might not be your time! Personally, I’d rather build the relationship up before marrying someone that I really don’t know. I plan on getting married only once, I believe if I can’t have a solid relationship with someone for a good amount of period of time, how can hold a marriage for 40+ years?!!
I admit I have always said, next person, I make my girlfriend, I will marry not because I expect that to happen but that is what I’d like to happen because I don’t have time to be wasting time with 3-month relationships. I am a grown-ass man. However, if I don’t marry anytime soon, cool. It’s not my time too!
A timeline is subjective and there’s nothing wrong with wanting more out of a casual dating situation but you can’t impose your timeline on someone after a year of dating and then cut them off because they didn’t want to commit because most men would not commit!
Let’s reverse the situation, a man wants to commit to a woman but she’s not ready, I gather most women would expect him to wait around for her? However, I bet women would tell their friends to leave the man if he wasn’t ready. Walking contradictions. I always say a lot of women only agree with scenarios if it benefits them, shit is annoying as hell and if you’ve followed my journey, you’d know what I think of that place.
Time is valuable and you can’t get it back once it’s passed, so use it wisely. You can make your dating decisions however you want. But men that successfully don’t rush into relationships the goal is to see how the woman handles lots of different situations and that isn’t always possible in two months. Giving a man an ultimatum to marry you within 1 year is an unrealistic expectation.
The timing seems to be the invariable third party in all our relationships and yet we never stop to consider why we let timing play such a drastic role in our lives. Timing is a bitch, yes. But it’s only if we let it be. Here’s a simple truth that I think we all need to face up to, the people we meet at the wrong time are actually just the wrong people. You never meet the right people at the wrong time because the right people are timeless! The right people make you want to throw the plans you originally had.
People constantly focus on how things should be (in their heads and visualize some perfect world that doesn’t exist. So when things happen in the real world that doesn’t happen the way that they thought it would, they always end up hurt and disappointed.
Partially true, however, sometimes it’s harder to get over the time you wasted than it is to get over who you wasted time with.
I’d say, I am I good with my time, I always seem to know when it’s the right time to get out of certain situations especially my jobs. All the ones I have left, have gone to shit.
If I leave a job, my workmates better are not too far behind me. It’s that real!
Nevertheless, be picky who you invest your time in, wasted time is worse than wasted money. If you got something good going and you want to invest in it, don’t mess that up because of your unrealistic expectations, the green isn’t always greener on the other side. There is no specific right time for anything. Do it when you’re feeling fully comfortable and don’t pressure yourself or *whispers* your partner.
My Dad sent me this about a year ago and it has always stuck with me.
You’re not early … you’re very much on time! Respect your time zone.
Your timezone is God’s time, so stay in your lane until then!
Listen, I am not your leader, I am not perfect and I don’t try to act that way for you. I am my own flawed individual and I’m not going to agree to disagree with the majority or minority. These are simply my thoughts! Appreciate everyone who reads my mind!
Next post 4th June at 8pm! See y’all then!
Wow i live in Kenya and ave never really thought about the time zone difference really, but its good to know your real and true to yourself at the end of the blog. you definitely deserve a like!
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Thank you for the lovely comment 😎
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That was such a useful read in a society full of “comparers” (including me). I do believe there is a time for everything but i also compare using these make belief time frames for things I should or shouldn’t have achieved!! That needs to STOP!! I’ll do my part and my best and let God do the rest!! Thanks for a wonderful read once again. Much love
Thank you for reading Alize!