Top of the morning/afternoon and evening to you!
We all make them but why do so many people really dwell on them?
I used to dwell way too much on mistakes, I know for a fact that won’t happen again. I’ve felt so low that when people would try and ring me they’d comment about “my phone not ringing and giving off a weird tone like I am abroad”.
Those times were when I had my phone on aeroplane mode while sitting in my house with my hands on my face. Roaming around all alone on the streets of London while just thinking about life and if I want to live this anymore.
Making mistakes can be very stressful. Here’s a concept: it’s good to make mistakes. That’s not a typo, folks, and I have not lost my mind. It is good to make mistakes, and here’s why. First of all, mistakes are a clear sign that you are trying new things. It’s always good to try new things because when you do this you are growing. If you never try anything new, how can you improve? How can you innovate? The simple answer is, “You can’t.”
Look around you, with very few exceptions, everything you see in your physical world is the result of someone trying something new. I realise that mountains, clouds and birds aren’t necessarily the result of someone trying something new but work with me here. Maybe it was. Think about that for a minute. The assembly process, the invention and refinement of the things we use today, had to be invented and perfected. Can you imagine how many mistakes were made before all of these individual materials and components were perfected and then assembled into what we know today?
I know for a fact, I haven’t made mistakes that will hurt anyone emotionally, that can’t run with me. But let’s name 5 off the top of my head.
- Not retiring from a sport I loved earlier enough.
- How about spending nearly 6 years with someone to find out she had been cheating for half the time? Letting her meet Mumzy, entering her home and get to know the family. Allowing her to consistently disrespect you but letting her get away with it even through the signs were so clear. Forgiving her after she confessed to cheating once then minutes later find out there was AT least 2 more.
- Not attending a Dubstep rave when it was popping. Missed out on Mala, Coki, DMZ all them man live!
- Going Uni (Not the social side)
- Not securing the woman of my dreams ages ago and then ending up in the friend zone.
I guess, most people know that it’s important to learn from their mistakes. However, learning as much as you can from them is easier said than done. Below, I will try and help you learn more effectively from your mistakes in 5 ways.
1. WE ALL DO IT BECAUSE WE’RE HUMAN
One of the best reasons why it’s okay to make mistakes is being able to learn from them. At least you better be learning! When you make a mistake you are that much closer to success. Why? Because when all is said and done, you will have tried things before you succeeded. Every time you made a mistake you eliminated one of those things and were one step closer. So go forth and make mistakes. Learn, grow, prosper and feel good in the knowledge that you are trying. From birth, we begin learning about the world around us. It’s a process of exploring, trying new things and collecting data about everything around us. The grass is soft, but rocks are not. Eating/drinking too much milk-related when you have intolerance will make you sick.
There are consequences —good or bad — for our actions. When you were a child and you fell off your bicycle and scraped your knee, it might’ve hurt but you learned that trying to do a wheelie down your street might not be the smartest idea. This same concept happens to adults all of the time except in more “adult” situations. You may not just be scraping your knee but you’re still learning a lesson and becoming more mature! Instead of “learn something new every day,” the phrase should be “learn something new every mistake”! The best way to learn is to experience life for ourselves and learn the natural consequences of our actions. After we develop critical-thinking skills, we can also observe the mistakes of others and see where their choices lead or anticipate possible outcomes. This can help us avoid major mistakes that can change the course of our life. However, this doesn’t mean that you should forge ahead with disregard for the consequences of a mistake. When you try something new you have to be willing to set some reasonable limits so that, in the event that it doesn’t work out the way you want it to, you will be in a position to try again. Realise that whatever you are trying probably won’t be perfect the first time; that’s life. But it doesn’t mean you shouldn’t try! Only by embracing and using your mistakes in this way can you make significant advances in your life.
If you think that you are the only person in the entire world who can make as many mistakes as you, I can definitely prove you wrong! A daily thought of mine used to consist of, “why can’t I just do this right?” or “why do I constantly make mistakes?” … this would bring my attitude down for the rest of the day! But then I started talking to some of my friends and family about this and I learned that I was definitely not alone. Remember that in this world there has to have been at least one person who has made the same mistake and they survived.
2. WHEN WE KNOW BETTER, WE DO BETTER
Making a mistake is not the end, it just means that we can correct ourselves and start again. If you’ve hurt someone, apologise. I am still waiting for certain people to do that but I doubt I’ll get that and so f it! If you’ve done something wrong, make it right, well at least try. After realising the error and making amends, learn from the misstep and avoid making the same kind of choice again. Being able to try again and make something better is one of the perks of making mistakes. Focus on what you have learned and pat yourself on the back for correcting the wrong. Leave the past in the past and look forward to making better choices in the future. Wallowing in guilt will only open the door wider for more poor choices. Have patience with yourself.
3. MISTAKES FUEL AMBITION
Forget to try to be perfect, and just do your best. Mistakes will still happen, but that is normal. Stop comparing yourself to the people of all walks of life. You may think they are perfect but everyone has their flaws, regardless of how good they are at hiding them. Perfection is unattainable while doing your best is a reachable goal. Mistakes will still happen. As long as you do your best, you are on the right track.
4. IT IS A PART OF LIFE
There are many aspects to life that are good and bad. Making mistakes is one of them!
It may not be the best part but it is definitely unavoidable. You just need to learn to deal with the fact that life is about learning and you can’t learn without messing things up and getting things back together again! Doing things that you are unsure about is a way that you can start to find out who you are. What other people think is a mistake might differ from what you think. You have to find out on your own. But the reality is that mistakes are essential to living a healthy life. Without having things go wrong or not having everything come out as planned, you wouldn’t be able to learn from these things and avoid them next time! So the next time that something doesn’t turn out how you wanted it to, don’t be too hard on yourself. Remind yourself that you can always do better and that you are not alone!
5. YOU FIGURE OUT WHO YOU ARE
Humans were not made to be perfect. Every person is special and unique in their own way! If you have never made a mistake in your entire lifetime then there is something wrong with you. You can try to avoid them as best as possible but if you do slip up, remember that it’ll always be okay! As I said, mistakes are essential for our growth and understanding of ourselves and the world. Whether it’s our mistake or an error of a family member, friend, partner or workmate, we need to realise that it does not make us, or them, bad people. We can learn, grow, change and start making better choices. Wrongs can be made right and we can become better as we learn to be patient with ourselves. Remember, everyone makes mistakes and it’s normal.
But if you make the same ‘mistake’ more than once, that’s not a ‘mistake’ that’s a decision and you have to deal with the repercussions especially if it hurts others.
Even for those that strive for perfection, we will still flounder and make errors in judgment from time to time. Instead of getting down on ourselves for not being perfect or for making errors, we should use mistakes as stepping stones in our earthly education.
These past couples of years, I’ve learned so much about myself due to the mistakes that I had made but they’ve made me who I am today! None of my mistakes has harmed anyone but myself emotionally or physically. I don’t consider any of my mistakes as mistakes nowadays. I am happy with my decisions at the time. Would I go back and change some of them, of course! I just had to learn to deal with the temporary pain of that ‘mistake’ so that you can find your true peace and happiness.
How long will you delay your peace? You don’t have to be broken anymore!
Don’t be scared to pass this around along with my other blogs to those who need it!
I know I’ve been a bit quiet on here!
Next 2 blogs are ready and due on 1st April at midday and 13th April at 8 pm! (UK times)
How bah that!
JasDon aka the DSD